Ballots

Last week I was talking about how to pick the right candidates for the positions that matter, but there's a few other voting guidelines which I have come up with. Sometimes and office doesn't seem wholly important to me, or I don't have strong feelings on the issues. Some years I've forgotten my own rules and walked into the voting booth (well, not really a booth, we don't have booths, we have awkward tables with little privacy screens) only to be surprised by some of the issues and positions up for a vote.  When I follow my own rules, this doesn't happen.

I don't like political surprises.

Rule One:

Find out what the ballot will look like ahead of time.  It really isn't that complicated. Most areas' major newspapers will run the ballots the weekend before the election so that no one is left guessing. This information is also available online. I found mine on the County Clerk's website.
By knowing who and what will be on your ballot,  you have the chance to research the topics that didn't seem germane last week.

Rule Two:
Research the unopposed candidates. Why even bother, right? Well, I don't know about the specific election rules where *you* are, but here, my votes count even when I skip a section. I have the choice to vote for or skip voting for an unopposed candidate. Unopposed candidates have to get a percentage of the vote to be elected, so it's really a yes or no proposition that is presented somewhat deceptively. So yes, I research the unopposed, at least a little, to know if I want to fill in that oval or leave it blank.

Rule Three:
Don't be afraid to leave blanks. As I said earlier, my votes still count, even if there are blanks on my ballot, so I remind myself that it's okay to leave a blank if I still don't know, still don't care, or just don't like anyone running. There are also always options on my ballot where there will be more than one opening on a board of some sort, and I'll be asked to vote for up to three or up to four people. Those are the magic words: up to. I'm not required to counterweight my vote for the one candidate whom I would like to see fill a position by also building up votes for her opponents just because they're the lesser evils coexisting on a ballot. So yes, one is up to three. Two is up to three. Three is up to three. All of these options, including zero, is perfectly acceptable.

Ultimately, I have to remember,

the ballot is not my boss.

Rule Four:

Bring the kids. What? Yes, I said bring the kids. Don't electioneer and tell them for whom you are voting and why, but by all means, bring them. If you know who you're voting for ahead of time because you researched the issues and the candidates, and you're not going to be surprised because you made sure you knew what the ballot was going to look like, their fidgeting isn't going to stop you from filling it out correctly and they're going to learn that voting is part of what adults do. It is part of what it means to be a member of a community. 

Far too few young people vote. Your children can learn to value it as much as you do if you show them that you value it and help them understand the process. I don't know about you, but I'm raising citizens.

That's it, in a nutshell. Look it up, research anything I didn't expect to find on the ballot, remember that I don't have to vote for everything, and make sure my kids get involved with the political process too. Is there anything I missed?

Do Not Censor Me

The First Amendment falls apart when government censorship threatens to put purveyors of legal content under scrutiny for any possible trace of copyright infringement.

Censorship silences.
The internet works partly because it gives people who have been silenced in other ways a voice.  It doesn't matter who you are, where you come from, the color of your skin, your faith, orientation, gender, or disability- sites that allow us to share content allow us to come together on an even playing field.

Say no to SOPA, contact your congressman and be heard.  Don't let sites dedicated to allowing you to share your own voice be threatened with legal action for the potential misuse of others.  Remember, congress only has the power to vote in favor of corporations over free speech when we vote for them in the first place.

I, for one, will not vote for any supporter of SOPA.



 See AmericanCensorship.org for more details. Thank you.

Gendered Legislating.

There should be a law against gendered legislating.
Why do I say this? Because Georgia State Rep Bobby Franklin wants a law on the books which would make it a felony to miscarry if it couldn't be shown that the miscarriage occurred naturally. That's right, he wants to make it illegal to have a miscarriage that the miscarrying woman and her doctors can not show for a fact was entirely natural and unaided.
You can read the bill here.
If Rep Bobby Franklin knew anything about miscarriage, he would know that in the majority of cases, no cause can be given.  Maybe it was low progesterone, maybe the fetus wasn't developing properly, maybe mom had a weird hormone spike, maybe swamp gas was reflecting light off of Venus.  Most of the time, the devastated and grieving mother is left wondering.  The notion that she should have to prove that she didn't seek to end her pregnancy is not only inhumane, it's the type of legislative nonsense that endangers lives and once again relegates women to the position of second class citizens. What?  You have a semi-functional uterus that failed you? Well, if you can't prove that something else didn't happen, you're going to jail, little missy.
There is so much wrong with this. First of all, proving a negative is impossible. Secondly, our nation is built on Common Law, not Napoleonic Law.  The burden of proof, in the United States, must lie with the accuser, not the accused.  Of course, we've already gone off the rational and human path if we are wasting taxpayer money and adding to the burden of grief and guilt of mothers who lose their pregnancies by creating Uterus Police to investigate losses which are 100% out of the purview of the government.  Lest we forget HIPAA, frankly, the government isn't entitled to this information to start with.
More disturbingly, this sort of legislation, while stripping women of the right to have their bodies function as they will, this sort of legislation will endanger the health and lives of women who are afraid to report pregnancies and seek health care if pregnant for fear of being investigated and charged with a felony should they miscarry.
Ironically, Republicans usually push for bills that will help businesses. Yet, this bill would certainly be bad for businesses.  Imagine how many early pregnancy tests wouldn't be purchased because God forbid a woman pee on a stick, get a faint positive, and then lose the pregnancy and have to worry that she'll be investigated if she tells anyone, especially if she doesn't follow through with the proposed investigation and formal fetal death certificate.  Of course, ectopic pregnancies would not be excluded, and one has to wonder how the Uterus Police would handle molar or chemical pregnancies.  What? There is no baby?  Where did it go?
Surely, this sort of biased, anti-woman, and anti-human Napoleonic legislation will not pass, but knowing that enough persons residing in the 43rd district in Georgia thought Bobby Franklin, who seems to think that women shouldn't have the right to have bodily functions go awry, was a worthy representative, scares me.
It scares me that we live in a nation where legislation that can only be used to persecute members of a specific gender can be entertained.
It scares me that Republican Bobby Franklin is in favor of taking one of the most tragic things that can happen to a member of *not his gender* and turn it into a felony.
Shame on him.
Shame on anyone who agrees with him.
Shame on anyone who wants to create crimes based on body functions, and moreover on gendered ones.

If you live in Georgia, I highly recommend you write or call your State Reps opposing this for intrusive, bigoted,  unethical lawmaking it is, and if you live in the 43rd district, I ask you to voice your opposition to Rep Franklin, both now and at election time.

*Note- this post is being written in anger and surely isn't as sensitivity worded as it should be. I realize I'm discussing this in terms of cis women, and that is because as one, that's the set of issues with which i have more familiarity.

What I told a friend

A friend wrote me, excited about the prospect of trying to concieve, and doubly excited about milk sharing programs since so many of her family members had struggled with supply.  After I responded, I thought, you know, maybe there are some other women out there who could benefit from my opinion on the subject, so here ya go.

Now here is what you need to know about underproduction.
1. Just because people to whom you are related have had this problem, there is no surety that you will also.
2. It can take time to get your supply to come in and tough it feels like baby isn't getting anything in the beginning, their stomachs are so tiny, they are likely getting enough.
3. Most women have wretched advice coming from people who aren't IBCLCs or who don't have much experience with breastfeeding outside their own personal breastfeeding history.
4. There are certain foods, and if necessary,certain prescriptions which can help wit low supply.
5. Any amount of breastfeeding, even with formula supplementation, is better for baby than none, so even with under-supply, give oneself a hand.
6. Before the baby is born(once you're pregtastic) find your local LLL group and start to make connections so that if/when you need support, it's there.
7. Breastsize has nothing to do with mammary capacity and output,as chics with huge tatas generally have a lot of adipose tissue in their breasts, not extra milk-making tissue.
8. This point intentionally left blank.
9. There are nursing techniques which help build a better supply.
10. If you go the hospital birth route, and you select a "baby friendly" institution, they will have an IBCLC with whom you can meet even before the baby is born so you can discuss concerns and strategies. If you go the midwife route, they can refer you to an IBCLC, as can your local LLL leadership.

*hugs*

Formula supplementation isn't failure, it is sometimes necessary, and we are trained to expect to do it, but with support, work (because don't let anyone tell you it isn't work, it's work) and a little biological agreement, you can likely breastfeed your offspring.

Child Abuse Awareness.

Instead of changing my facebook avatar to a picture of Rainbow Brite, I'm giving you this simple link to a government pamphlet outlining the signs of child abuse so you can recognize it when you see it, and intervene.

The signs of Child Abuse

*I don't necessarily agree that a non-vaccinated child is per-se being neglected, though I have known children who didn't get their vaccinations because they would have had to go to the doctor, and the doctor would have seen the bruises, so please don't argue about the inclusion of that point in said pamphlet.

Cover It Up

Dear Wisconsin Board of Tourism,
I'm going to go out on a limb and suppose that you might have the ability to grab a lawmaker and say "hey, tourism brings in revenue, and I just found out that a very simple new hunting rule just might mean more people want to spend their time and money in our state... so here's what I'm thinking..."
And here's what I'm thinking.
Cover Your Carcass. *
If you have a gutted deer strapped to your truck, put a tarp on it.
An eviscerated deer, still oozing on the SUV, complete with gaping bloody body cavity, is violence, gore, and death, can be very traumatizing to witness, for drivers and passengers alike.
I don't live in Wisconsin, and after a short visit to your *otherwise* lovely state, and seeing over ten deer carcasses on the highway driving home, I found myself saying to my spouse, "do we have to come back here?"  Interestingly, he responded "I wonder how people would like it if they had cut up dead people on their trucks."  I was very surprised that even my spouse was upset by having to spend many miles right behind a red dead deer, with a large deep ragged hole where it's rump should have been.
I found myself slowing down in the hopes someone would pass me. When no one did, I found myself trying to speed up to pass the truck, and I realized it was making me make less safe driving choices than I usually did.  I realized that I was so uncomfortable I had forgotten all the fun we'd had up in the Coulees, and instead was just hoping I wouldn't get stuck behind another vivisected animal.
So here's a thought.  Have hunters toss a tarp over their animals.  It'll keep road dirt out of the exposed meat, and keep other drivers from having to focus their vision somewhere other than on the traffic in front of them.

Then less people who have often enjoyed spending time in your beautiful state will be thinking "maybe we should just spend the weekend in Chicago, less likely to see a bloody corpse."

I am not against hunting. I'm against having to look at gore while I'm driving.  I also would like to note that I noticed I wasn't the only driver who went out of his or her way to avoid driving behind bloody deer carcasses, and I wondered if it may have contributed to whatever driving errors led to the accidents which gave me the time to get irritated enough about the issue to take finger to keyboard.

Sincerely,
Slee

*I know, I'm a huge proponent of the right o feed infants, at the breast, without a cover, and I argue "you don't like it, don't look," but I feel this is a very different issue.

Breastfeeding is natural infant nourishment, whereas a

Transgender Day of Rememberance

I want to write about this, but I can't.  I am too angry that because of the transphobia endemic to American culture, people who just wanted to be who they are, even when it wasn't what we expected of them, based on what their genitals looked like at birth, suffer harassment, brutality, rape, and murder. These are hate crimes. I am angry that the same people are often harassed and marginalized to the point of depression, self injury, and suicide.
I'm ashamed of us, as a people.
Stop hating people because they're different.

Abomination Pie

We have one week left until Thanksgiving, so I'm sharing some of my favorite recipes.
I'm torn on this because I don't know if I'll be making it this year.  I need to find a new source for my canned pumpkin, or make my own pumpkiny goodness out of a pie pumpkin, but that takes all the easy peasy out of this recipe.  You see, apparently Libby's, the ready to go canned pumpkin at my grocery store is part of my NoNestle boycott.  Sad, no?
So I'm looking for options.  But nonetheless, here's what my brother has lovingly termed "Abomination Pie," which he says with an eager and full mouth.

Abomination Pie  

Crust:
1 box Yellow cake mix(-1 cup which is reserved for topping)
 1 egg
1/2 cup melted butter.

Mix & press into a 9"x 13" cake pan.

Filling:
 1 large can of pumpkin   (This usually involves eggs and some spices.)

Follow directions on the can to make filling. Pour onto crust.

Topping:
1 cup Yellow cake mix,
1/4 cup turbinado or raw sugar
1/4 c soft butter
1 tsp cinnamon.
OPTIONAL- 3 Tbsp crushed toffee bits or nuts

Mix together and sprinkle on top.

Bake 45 minutes at 350.  Serve with your whipped cream of choice.

This is not enough.

This is not enough.

However, the new TSA guidelines which involve what is more and more commonly being referred to as molestation and groping are completely a violation of basic human rights.

So first and foremost, stop flying. I know we can't all stop flying, but I do know that I can.  I am not going to set myself up to be sexually assaulted. And don't tell me that just because they are supposed to tell you what they are going to do that it's not molestation or sexual assault, as you've been stripped of the right to refuse consent. (Arguably you can say, "heck no, don't touch me, i'm not getting on the plane anyway, screw my ability to get home and the money I spent before I knew that buying a plane ticket was entering a genital fondling lottery," but arguably, in the moment, most people are going to just be shocked at what is going on, taken aback, and too busy worrying about how to get through the moment than coming up with alternate travel arrangements.)

So, please, rehearse this before you book your flight.

NOD

Name - get the name of the party who will be performing your search. Write it down or repeat it over and over again while they're doing it.
Options - Ask if there are any alternatives such as full body scan. (I am going to try to find out what happens if you just say "No."  In any other scenario, you have the right to not have your genitals palpated.)
Document - This is the tricky part. Enlist someone, even a stranger if you are traveling alone.  Hand them your phone or camera and have them photograph or film what is done to you.

It is not enough. It won't stop them from feeling your parts, possibly undoing years of therapy and requiring another series of trips to the therapist, but if they violate the law while molesting you, you have their name, you have documentation, you can take legal action.

Me? I won't be flying. I won't be letting my children fly. No form of transportation is worth it to me.

As a side thought, how does that work if your job requires flight? "No, I'm not going to sexually harass you, I'm just going to require that you frequently put yourself in a position to be sexually assaulted."

Seriously, TSA, this is across the line.

A Less Civil Response.

July 9, 2010
Bob McLain
Program Director, 106.3 FM
bmclain@entercom.com

Dear Director McLain,

Recently, my attention was drawn to  a segment that aired on the Russ & Lisa show on Tuesday, July 6, 2010. in which Lisa Rollins, whom you employ as a news anchor and a talk host thought it was an apt idea to question the rights of infants to eat in restaurants and for their mothers to feed them in a safe environment.  I've read some of the other responses you've gotten, ones like the one Dionna Ford wrote, responses which are calm, non-argumentative, and reasonable.  This isn't that response.  I'm too livid.


Can I first state the ridiculousity of saying breastfeeding in a restaurant is disgusting when one is in said restaurant, a Chic Fil-A, most likely eating the breast of another animal, to be offended that woman might be using hers to feed her baby?  Because it is ridiculous. 


Also, I noted from what Ms. Rollins had to say that she was in the Chic Fil-A, not eating in her car.  I presume that since she said it was "100 dadgum degrees," that she would have found it uncomfortable to eat her meal in the car.  Similarly, I would imagine that a baby and mother would rather not be sitting in said uncomfortable environment.  However, maybe I'm wrong. Perhaps Ms. Rollins would like to take all of her meal breaks in her car for a while so she can tell me how delightful, uncramped, and cool it is.  That sounds fair.


If in your judgement it is too hot for Ms. Rollins to be expected to eat in her car, preferably with the air off, there is an oil crisis going on right now, as a news anchor could probably tell you, maybe she'd like to eat in the bathroom.  Other than the part where bathrooms are areas set aside for dealing with human waste, I can't imagine she'd have a problem with it, considering that she thinks it's a good place for someone with a still developing immune system to eat.  She also doesn't seem to think that a nursing mom would mind spending her time out of the house in the restroom, so I can't imagine why she would mind spending her off-the-air time in the restroom.


That brings me to my next point. Off the air time.  Maybe she needs some.  She thinks that moms just staying home instead is a reasonable option, so I invite her to do it. As her employer, you could help make that a reality.  The way I look at it, the World Health Organization recommends breastfeeding up to at least two years of age and as long thereafter as it is mutually beneficial to both members of the nursing dyad, so that sounds like a good period of time that she should just stay home. Two years.   You know, stay home, discreetly.


She also implied that perhaps the mother of the nursing infant could have nursed in the car on the way there.  Other than the part where it's illegal to travel in a moving vehicle with an infant who is not properly restrained in their car seat, that's a brilliant idea.  Oh wait, it's a horrible idea because it is a suffocation risk to lean over the carseat to nurse an infant and it's dangerous and illegal to remove said child from said carseat while it is in motion. Further, if the mother was driving, it's a whole new level of irresponsibility, illegality, and danger.   I admit it, I'm disturbed that you have a news anchor and talk show host in your employ who recommends, even jokingly, illegal practices which endanger children.


As per Ms. Rollins suggesting that nursing in public, which, by the way, is a specifically protected right in the state of South Carolina, as well as in the vast majority of the United States, and is supported in most of the rest of the world, should have legislation enacted to criminalize it just grieves me deeply.  I can't imagine that the majority of your listeners are so against infants being nourished in the most healthy way possible, but I would postulate that if she were saying that drinking beer in public, which, unlike breastfeeding which encourages healthy development, kills brain cells, damages livers, increases the incidence of people making ignorant comments, and leads to deaths, injuries, and property damage via inebriated drivers and needless altercations, should be made illegal, there'd be a bigger uproar.


So if I was being nice, and tactful, and unaggressive, I'd ask that she not only recant but take a class on Women's issues and another on breastfeeding, but I'm not being nice.  I'm being bombastic and disgusted and suggesting that she eat in the car, and in the bathroom, and stay home for the next two years.   And then and only then will I give her or your station any credibility.


I'm usually nicer than this, but this sort of anti-baby, anti-family, anti-woman, anti-health attitude has got to stop.


Have a nice weekend,
Slee

My Hero(ine)

Yesterday started out pretty normal.  Mongoosine fought the heat off by lazing around the house until the pool opened, and then gave her customary half question half statement "Pool?" accompanied by eyes darting toward the door, right before her feet followed pursuit.  It helped that a friend had just shown up on the porch.

I hollered "Sunscreen!" after her as she was dashing off the porch, waving a hand holding said sunscreen toward me as she and her friend rushed down the sidewalk toward the pool in that huddled way that girls do when they have secrets to share.  

I smiled, sighed, and went back to doing my mom-stuff, figuring she'd probably come home around 3:30 for adult swim, so I was somewhat surprised when at 2:14 a drippy wet daughter of mine was standing at the door asking if she and her friend could take snacks to the park.

I heard my husband ask why they'd left the pool.

"Pool's closed."

I admit, my eavesdropping mommy-sense kicked in.

I'll spare you the tween speak two word answers through which the rest of the story unfolded and sum it up.

Basically, my daughter made them close the pool. That picture up there? That's of the fire department draining the pool in the most summer-fun way they could think of.  They eventually got tired of doing it that way and got a few fire hoses to spray at ground level so no one had to hold anything.

Mongoosine had a lot of fun dancing in the spray while I verified her story with the pool managers.

Snapdragon even enjoyed the mist at the edge of the spray.

WHAT HAPPENED. (I'm sure she'll correct me and that I have the story ENTIRELY wrong - insert eye roll)

While swimming in the shallow end with her friends, doing underwater stunts like handstands and sitting on the floor of the pool, Mongoosine noticed something tickled her feet.  Upon further sub-aquatic investigation, she discovered the source of the "tickle" was a crack that was creating suction and pulling water through it.  Upon even closer examination she discovered a crack perhaps a foot long, and straight.  No, it was NOT shaped like this.  

She checked.  Twice.

Alas, it was merely a very normal not-two-moments-in-time-which-never-should-have-touched-creating-a-crack-in-the-universe run of the mill kind of crack.  But, she decided that it did have quite a bit of suction for a crack in the pool, especially in the shallow end where the not-so-great swimmers swim.  Therefore, she told a lifeguard. 

And the lifeguards had to get everyone out of the pool so they could investigate the boring normal not-Doctor-call-worthy crack in the bottom of the pool.  The crack was deemed a safety hazard, the pool was closed, and immediately drained.

The fire department had the pool drained in about 2 hours while the pool manager called the swimming lessons kids to cancel their morning lessons.  

Mongoosine was sad that she wouldn't get to swim for a few days while they fixed the pool.

Empty pool. *sigh*

See here the people working in the far away pool as the sun began to sink low?  Well, they did their job and did it well. Spouse tells me there is a patch welded into the bottom of the pool now, a bit over a foot square.  I didn't have a chance to see it because my sundown they were already refilling the pool.  Much to my surprise, it reopened at 1:00 this afternoon, right on schedule.  I imagine my little heroine who had the bravery to report a problem will be back soaking up the sun and splashing in the pool as soon as she finishes her leisurely lunch.

I'm proud of her. I don't know if I'd have said anything when I was her age.  I'm proud that she has the confidence to say something when she sees something she doesn't think is right.  I'm proud that she has ability to recognize an unrecognized problem.  

I'm just proud of her.  She's my hero.

Great Blocks of Goodness

Why so silent?  I've been stewing about some Things that I wanted to respond to objectively.  I'm almost calmed down enough that I can write rationally, but not quite, so I thought I'd talk about something mostly happy!  I like happy, don't you.

A big block of monstrously happy making goodness.  It's soft cushy baby friendly goodness, and Snapdragon likes it profusely.
The minky is swirly pettable fun, the print has Monsters proudly proclaiming what type of monster they are, whether they're friendly monsters or the egg monster, and the ribbons are fun. The ribbons are the MOSTLY happy part. I'll get back to that in a minute.
Snapdragon LOVES his block.  He positively beamed when he got it on his birthday.  He seemed to like the colors and he likes pulling on the ribbons and sucking on the ribbons.  I think the ribbons are delightful too.  Spouse's favorite feature is that it's just the right kind of squishy to use as a pillow in a car on road trips while I'm driving.  Snapdragon also thinks it's great for road trips.  See?

Perfect for car trips.

Snapdragon also thinks that it's the perfect amount of squishy to use as a ball when he can't find one and that it is a good compliment to his world balls for being ruler of the universe.  You know, Earth, Mars, Monster Cube Planet.  

As a mom who loves to sew, I'd also like to point out the fact that the block is very well made, remarkably block shaped for a stuffed toy (or am I the only one who has trouble with stuffed cubes looking like pointy spheres?) and is altogether fun.

I got this block from my dear friend Ailie whose Etsy shop is just bursting with fun felt food and sensory blocks.  You should check her out. You should like her on Facebook too.  She's rad.  She also makes other fantastic blocks, you know, if you don't heart monsters the way I do.

Radness.

Yummy yummy radness.

The MOSTLY part.

This is one of the things I have known I was going to have to blog about but didn't have the words. I'm not fully there yet, but this is a beginning.

See the ribbons?  See how they're lovely and pennant like in that they stop abruptly, are heat-sealed wonders of infant joy inducing raditude?  They're why Snapdragon has a block. My good friend Ailie needed to test out a way to keep the ribbons and not have them loop, yet not fray.  Why can't they just loop?  Because there's this company with a punitive policy of hounding, hampering the business of, and otherwise messing with the groove of WAHMs who have great baby friendly products.  They've somehow managed to get a ribbon loop sewn between two layers of cloth patented.
Yes, that's right.  That tag on the inside of your shirt as a child?  On the backside of your toy?  Those loops of ribbon telling you how to wash your mom's fifty year old blouse that was her mother's?  Well they have somehow managed to get a patent on that technology, despite the fact that it's been used for a long time prior to them. Maybe I'll patent water.  I also think they have a patent on being jack asses, so next time you see someone doing that, be sure to tell them someone else holds a patent and they need to cease and desist.  
Note I'm not naming the company.  I want their internet trolls to have to do their work before finding this post, because troll they do, and mostly on Etsy.  A friend with looped ric rac (you know, because that's SO exactly like a ribbon, except for the part where it isn't a ribbon at all) on her baby friendly product just had her products pulled the other day.  So not cool.
So yeah, these blocks are made of AWESOME, and I love ours.  The WAHM who makes them is a great mom, a creative woman, and an all around delight to have in the online business world and as a friend.

So yes, I think people should buy her awesomeness because she's my friend, but more so because I don't like bullies, and I view spreading awareness of her goods as a way to stick it to the corporate man, and lets face it, he needs it stuck.

Disclosure: Yep, I tested her non-loopy prototype all freetasticly.  Also, if there's actually some poor government employee who has to read these ridiculous disclosures, you straight up should buy one of these for the next baby shower you attend.  It'd be like sticking it to the man while sticking it to the man, oh, and go eat a cupcake.  Working for the government is probably pretty soul sucking, and cupcakes are good for that.

WHO Gave You My Address? An open letter to Mead Johnson & Company

Mead Johnson Nutrition,
2400 West Lloyd Expressway-B215
Evansville, IN 4772


Dear Mead Johnson Nutrition/ Mead Johnson & Company

 I don't know who gave you my address, but as a breastfeeding mother, I'm less than thrilled with the discount formula "checks" you sent to my house. The "nutritional building blocks he needs now" don't come from your "Toddler Formula," they come from breast milk and real foods.

I also think you should know that bolding and capitalizing "PREMIUM" really isn't trade markable, but more over, there is nothing premium, other than the price one pays, about your formula. In order to be distributed and marketed as a breast milk substitute, any formula has to meet certain FDA established guidelines.  Other than the fact that yours is a formula created by chemists to be more like what a toddler needs than what a newborn needs, you're not special.  I'm a little irritated that you're trying to mislead parents with said bold capitalized words.

I'm even more mad that you had the gall to print "Getting the right nutrition seems easy with breast milk or infant formula, but now it is a bit more complex.  Make sure your toddler gets the nutrition she needs after infant formula, for growth, brain and immune system development" with your product.  That you went on to say your product was chemically formulated "to help toddlers get balanced nutrition when they need it most with essential vitamins, antioxidants, iron and DHA [chemical soup de' jour] helps provide a strong foundation for healthy development," only adds to my displeasure.

This implies that getting the right nutrition with breast milk is an illusion, because it only seems simple and doesn't have added vitamins, antioxidants, heavy metals, and acronyms we're told we need, when in fact, breast milk provides the nutrition a toddler needs for growth, brain and immune system development.  Any formula trying to do similar is imitating breast milk, and the phrasing on this propaganda you sent my house is clearly crafted to cast doubt on the nutritional value of breast milk and continued breastfeeding past one year of age.

The World Health Organization recommends that infants be breastfed exclusively to 6 months, and continue to be breastfed until at least 2 years of age, and beyond 2 years as is beneficial and mutually desirable to both parties of the nursing dyad.

The precise World Health Organization breastfeeding recommendation is:

"Breastfeeding is an unequalled way of providing ideal food for the healthy growth and development of infants; it is also an integral part of the reproductive process with important implications for the health of mothers. As a global public health recommendation, infants should be exclusively breastfed(1) for the first six months of life to achieve optimal growth, development and health(2). Thereafter, to meet their evolving nutritional requirements, infants should receive nutritionally adequate and safe complementary foods while breastfeeding continues for up to two years of age or beyond."

You can read more about the WHO breastfeeding recommendation and the Global Strategy on Infant and Young Child Feeding here.

Promoting any special toddler formula with misleading wording regarding the nutritional value of breast milk is disingenuous and certainly a violation of the WHO code (International Code of Marketing Breast-milk Substitutes) and despite the fact that the United States does not yet enforce said code through fines and other penalties, violation of the WHO code costs lives every year.   

Breast milk inarguably supports the healthy and proper development of the immune system, and research has shown time and again that breastmilk evolves with the growing child's ever changing needs to be the appropriate food to nourish growth and immune system development.  Also, breastfeeding, not just breast milk, also has the added benefit of helping further develop a strong sense of attachment, trust and security in the child.  Formula can't do that.  Lovingly feeding a toddler can, and I am not saying that formula can not be given in a way that furthers those bonds, but formula itself can not.

I also noted that in the image of your product, it boasts "Great Taste!" and that it comes in both unflavored and vanilla.  Not only is it not a real food, it's natural ingredients readily identifiable, it's also artificially flavored, because our children need more of that in their diets. 

I also find it interesting that after using misleading language about the value of breast milk, you proudly use the words "Milk Based" on your product's canister- because while species appropriate breast milk is apparently not good enough, cross-species breast milk chemically reconfigured certainly must be.

So Mead Johnson Nutrition, you tried to mislead me.  You treated me like I'm not smart enough or informed enough to understand what you're trying to do through your advertising. I'm angry.  I won't be rushing into the grocery store to get five dollars off the price of your magic new chemical soup of growing, and I certainly won't be giving your company's products preference when buying.  

You don't value the health of my children, and that right there says a lot to me.

Sincerely,

Slee Fenton, Proud Breastfeeding Mother to a Very Healthy 11.5 Month Old Baby

Giving

My twitter friend @RockerByeBaby has adopted two families for Christmas through WishUponAHero, and we're chipping in over here. You can read about that here. Why? Because giving is an essential part of humanity, and I feel blessed to be able to help moms in need.

So if you want to make someone's holiday truly blessed, you can get in touch with Amber, or check out WishUponAHero and adopt a family of your own.

Happy holidays.

Wordless Wednesday: Locks of Love

Wordless Wednesday

For info on how to donate your hair, go to Locks of Love.

But I'm Shy

I get about a hundred emails a day choc full of things I can get involved in. That I want to get involved in. That mean something to me and all I have to do to participate is show up. But I'm shy.

Okay, I really get like four a week, but still, they add up, and the toll they take on my brain while I'm thinking "rally to save the library? Love to!" but the rest of me says "then again, what if the people there all know each other?"

Snapdragon was 3 months old before I sucked it up and went to my first LLL meeting. Three months. Do you know how beneficial it could have been had we gone in the first month? And how wonderful would it have been to sooner meet some other "sorta crunchy" moms who don't look at me like I'm crazy for breastfeeding, babywearing, co-sleeping, cloth daipering, or even leaving my sweet Snapdragon intact? How much a relief would it have been to be able to discuss the day to day trials, tribulations, and triumphs of livin' la vida AP, and preferably sans BPA without causing a debate?

It would be huge.

So this got me thinking. Why don't I go to the events that I know will be filled with like minded people, with whom I'd probably get along quite well? Why not go just a little out of my normal routine to spend time with real flesh and blood human beings, people with whom I can make eye contact and probably agree with on major issues? Oh yeah... because I'm shy.

Why don't I just show up and make a difference? Because I'm shy.

So here's the thing. We need to stop being shy.

Sure it means a week of working up the nerve to go to something, but I nearly always find that the effort was worth it, so I need to get there. I need to find the mode of thinking and living where it becomes "save the library rally? I'm there."

Because that, dear reader, is where change comes from.

So, are you all shy like me, or do you get out there? And if you're shy and out there, please, oh please, teach me your ways, because I need some help!

The Power of Advertising

If you picked up a baby or parenting magazine right now, there are two things I can nearly guarantee you. One, it will say somewhere that Breast is Best. Two, the ads will do their damnedest to leave you with the message that formula is what normal people do and is choc full of healthy vitamins and nutrients that your baby won't get anywhere else.

WHO Code violation anyone?

But no one cares. No one cares that formula manufacturers advertise and promote their knock-off baby milk substitute to American moms. This is a first world nation, right? It's not like the WHO Code should extend to civilization. Duh. Breast is only really best for women with dark skin in backwards lands without all the science and government oversight that makes formula far superior here. Right?

Wrong.

There are people who do care that new mothers are receiving formula samples and coupons in the mail.

There are people who do care that we are constantly being bombarded with pacifier, bottle, and formula imagery.

I am one of those people.

Are you?

I have this idea. What if we STOP buying magazines with formula ads? What if we tell the various corporations publishing the magazines we love that we won't buy them until they stop selling advertising space to WHO code violators, or at least disallow WHO code violating ads? Think we could create some change?

Nes-Quick Change

I recently found out about Nestle's WHO code non-compliance (checkout babymilkaction.org if you haven't heard yet) as well as their unethical Mugabe supporting milk buying and child slave-labor produced cocoa buying, and so I made the mistake of going through my house to see which Nestle products I currently use, and now I am faced with the difficult task of figuring out what they'll be replaced with.
Can you help me?

I need non-evil and yummy (when aplicable) alternatives to the following products.

Strawberry Nes-Quik
Ovaltine (malt)
Carnation instant breakfast (strawberry and vanilla)
Tidy Cat liter

That's all I can think of at the moment, but seriously, I need help here.
Suggestions?
(I will try to include links to all the Nestle fail I mention in the first paragraph when I am at a real computer)

Boycott Worthy

So I pushed both of my children out of my own body, and as a consequence, I love them as my own. That said, when you hear language thrown casually around like "It must be hard to love an adopted child as much as your own," it's time to take notice of the message that's being sent.

My father adopted my brother, and looking back, yes there were differences in how we were treated, but I really and truly believe it isn't an issue of love, it's a difference of age, gender, and personality. I know a lot of people who have adopted and many of them have genetic children too, and I have never seen an instance of loving one or the other be an issue. No, it turns out that parents love their kids as a general rule, and people who would have trouble loving an adopted child pretty much don't think about adopting in the first place.

So with this ridiculous horror flick coming out from Warner Brothers, "Orphan," I just want to take a moment to voice my disgust.

First of all, most people have better taste than to go waste their money on a poorly written movie in the first place, but that doesn't mean that we don't see the previews on television or watch the trailers while getting ready to watch better flims than this one. The problem therein is that the negative message is still being sent. A family adopts a girl from an orphanage and jeapordizes their own sweet and perfect fair haired angels.

Having known people who were bounce from foster home to foster home all the while praying for an adoptive home, this really upset me. There are already enough forces out there saying "don't adopt an older child, they have issues and are too much work." Movie makers really don't need to be hopping on that bandwagon too!

On another level, this movie is further stigmatizing a group of kids who really don't need it. It's hard enough to be young, but by painting an adpoted child as a psychotic menace and plastering that representation all over the social landscape through a media form already popular with the very demographic most likely to get the wrong idea about adoption and to tease adoptees, well, it's down right irresponsible.

Shame on you Warner Brothers. Shame on Dark Castle Entertainment. Shame on Appian Way.

It is cruel and irresponsible of you single out a population with enough social pressures to deal with and further stigmatize them.

Shame on you.

So, I'm asking you, dear readers, all 29 of you, not to see this film. Do not pay your money to perpetuate irresponsible filmmaking and negative social messages.

Tell your friends not to see this film.

Tell Warner Brothers that you're not seeing this film and why. Tell them that throwing around phrases that question an adoptive parent's ability to love their adoptive child as their own is hurtful to adpotive parents and children everywhere.

Be really ballsy. Tell Warner Brothers that you won't see ANY of their movies until they alter such prejorative and damaging language. Then follow through.

Tell Warner Brothers to grow a conscience.

Then, learn more about adoption.

There is no greater tool with which to fight ignorance than information.

Love & Light.