Friday, October 16, 2009

But I'm Shy

I get about a hundred emails a day choc full of things I can get involved in. That I want to get involved in. That mean something to me and all I have to do to participate is show up. But I'm shy.

Okay, I really get like four a week, but still, they add up, and the toll they take on my brain while I'm thinking "rally to save the library? Love to!" but the rest of me says "then again, what if the people there all know each other?"

Snapdragon was 3 months old before I sucked it up and went to my first LLL meeting. Three months. Do you know how beneficial it could have been had we gone in the first month? And how wonderful would it have been to sooner meet some other "sorta crunchy" moms who don't look at me like I'm crazy for breastfeeding, babywearing, co-sleeping, cloth daipering, or even leaving my sweet Snapdragon intact? How much a relief would it have been to be able to discuss the day to day trials, tribulations, and triumphs of livin' la vida AP, and preferably sans BPA without causing a debate?

It would be huge.

So this got me thinking. Why don't I go to the events that I know will be filled with like minded people, with whom I'd probably get along quite well? Why not go just a little out of my normal routine to spend time with real flesh and blood human beings, people with whom I can make eye contact and probably agree with on major issues? Oh yeah... because I'm shy.
Why don't I just show up and make a difference? Because I'm shy.

So here's the thing. We need to stop being shy.
Sure it means a week of working up the nerve to go to something, but I nearly always find that the effort was worth it, so I need to get there. I need to find the mode of thinking and living where it becomes "save the library rally? I'm there."
Because that, dear reader, is where change comes from.

So, are you all shy like me, or do you get out there? And if you're shy and out there, please, oh please, teach me your ways, because I need some help!


7 reflections:

Krista said...

I am super shy in real life. I have very few real life friends because people mistake my shyness for snobbishness. I like to get involved with things but when I try I usually get over shadowed by the more out-going people and end up in the back by myself. Sorry not really helping much am I? ;)

Slee said...

I have similar problems dear, lol. *hugs*
I don't readily understand social cues. I do a far better job of reading them, hence the onlineness.

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Jess said...

nice spam comment! lol

I am SOOOOOO shy! I have like hardly any friends IRL I don't go to LLL or anything of the sorts because im WAY too shy! I get physically ill if I have to go to some social outting its really bad.... ;)

BabeeLove said...

Me too! I'm so guilty of being shy. I avoid crowds and will avoid people. When I do go out, I feel invisible because people will run right into me and I can see them coming. They won't move unless I do. I'm glad I'm not the only that is this shy! I'm def. having to get over it slowly because I'm with the kids and want to show them confidence (I don't have much of when I'm out). Thanks for this great post!

MommyGeek said...

I'm shy. :( I've been part of various mom get together groups and girls groups via Meetup.com for almost a year now and I've been to one meeting.

I even paid dues.

But I can't seem to get my butt out of the house to go. I'm afraid of an awkward situation. I used to be so fearless. I'm not sure what happened.

Tracey said...

I am shy too. Over the past couple of years I have just started joining and showing up at things. Things I have learned:
1. Most of the people there have no clue who anyone else is either
2. If you just say "hi" to the person next to you, you will feel less alone (and so will they)
3. If you offer to help in someway with the event/organization (reply to those emails with an offer) you will have a "purpose" and not feel on the outside looking in
4. Get the "what ifs?" out of your head. It's the "what ifs" that cause fear and panic. :)