Friday, June 26, 2009

CLOSE THE DOOR!

Do you know how many doors your house has? Make a guess, and then go through your house, physically or mentally, and count them. Got em all? More than you thought? Did you include the closets? Well, I'm going to guess that I've got more doors than you do.
Our house has a lot of doors.
External doors: 3 on front porch, 1 off side of kitchen, a sliding door off side of sitting room, and 4 off ersatz family room which used to be a garage. 2 more if we count the huge garage doors. That makes 11 external doors of which I can think.
Then there's another 16, I believe, between rooms on the main floor, and 8 closet doors, bringing the total to, oh wait, i forgot the kitchen, 12 closet doors, bringing the total to 30 main floor doors. In the basement there are 10.
we have 51 doors in this house, so bear that in mind. Fifty-one, one and fiddy. That's like 50 cent, and a penny, only doors.
Now, my spouse likes to keep the doors closed. That's right. All of them, with one exception, he likes to keep closed. This means that we're constantly opening and closing doors as though moving through a series of air locks. Part of this is because he's a bit of a hermit, and part of this is because he's just freaky-deeky about keeping the cats in one part of the house and the people in the other.
In the winter it is awesome because we can regulate the temperatures of various rooms by opening and closing the vents. It's also nice that to some extent a person can at times feel like they have more privacy because of these fifty-one doors. Oh, no. That's not right. I forgot the screen doors. We now are up to fifty-six. That's fifty cents, a nickel, and a penny. Eep!
Now, all this said, I didn't grow up in a house where the conservation of heat is a science in the wintertime. This might have something to do with the fact that the house I grew up in wasn't built a hundred years ago, and as a result was actually insulated, but in any case, this door phenomenon was new to me.
Well, I've actually adapted quite well to always closing the doors behind me and corralling the animals so they don't invade the rest of the house, but Mongoosine, well, she lacks this skill.
Ironically, she most thoroughly lacks this skill when it comes to the exterior doors... and I'm sure you can imagine how I feel about the air conditioned air wafting out through the screen...
Can you guess what she hears a lot of in our house?

1 comment:

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